How To Tell If Your Girlfriend's a Bitch

How To Tell If Your Girlfriend's a Bitch!

This is a subject I've been thinking about a lot lately, what with a girl (who will remain nameless) ripping my heart out, pissing on it, and then keeping it to hang on her wall like the rednecks do with deer antlers. That dirty bitch dated me for two years and I would have done anything for her, absolutely anything.  Three weeks before we called it quits, she started dating another guy behind my back (I found this out when we broke up).  She was fucking a guy behind my back, her friends (who are now my friends) foiled her and told me because they didn't believe I deserved that. They stopped being her friend and I stopped being her boyfriend.  That was two months ago.  Since then I've been thinking a lot.  You can't help but believe when you get cheated on, that you're at fault and that you're the punchline of everyone's joke. Trust me, that's not the case, your girlfriend is just a bitch. So, in that spirit I composed a list of warning signs for guys to look out for, if these signs become apparent, run for your fucking life.  Sure, your girlfriend may seem awesome, but please watch out for these warning signs.  Starting out in any relationship is great.  When you truly like someone you get that warm/fuzzy feeling inside and a calm feeling of safety when you're with the one you're pursuing.  The beginning is a game, even if this isn't said, it's a race to see who immediately gets the upper-hand in the relationship. Both guys and girls both do this and it's truly not the way to start out. How you can tell if you're compatible with a girl is if you can sit and watch tv or a movie and share complete comfortable silence.  There's nothing wrong with that, but when you feel like you need to keep talking to keep interest, you're in trouble.  Someone who really likes you, won't care about staying entertained, they just want to enjoy your company. That goes for girls and guys.  Is the best part of a relationship the thrill of the chase? Does the fun go out the window once you start exclusively dating?  I don't want to believe that's the only good thing about a relationship, but with the state I'm in and the random acts of going on dates with different girls and seeing what "dating life" is all about, it's easy to believe that.  I have to just suck it up and know that there is a girl out there who is not all evil.   This isn't one sided either ladies, guys can be assholes, 100% true.  But enough with this rant, here's my list...

Sign #1:

Your girlfriend excessively repeats following phrase: "What are we going to do tonight?" This implies you have go out and do something in order to have a good time with you. Talking and hanging out is not enough.  This problem usually rises midway through a relationship, or sometimes early (that's a bad sign).

Sign #2:

Your girlfriend hates your friends and will not let you hang out with them. Both conditions of this sign have to be met in order for it to be valid as the chances of your girlfriend liking your friends are rather slim even if she isn't a bitch. Just like the way you probably won't like her friends because they are a bunch of bubbly girls who can't possibly identify with.

Sign #3:

Your girlfriend is a bubbly girl you can't possibly identify with.

Sign #4:

Bubbly/airhead'ed girls an not only brainless, but heartless as well. Sure, they may be incredibly hot, but you have to remember because of their physical beauty their entire lives have been far easier than yours. People do things for them and they're used to it. And someone who expects you to do everything for them, is a bitch.

Sign #5:

Your girlfriend stops wanting sex. Sure, I know this one sounds a little bit shallow, but hear me out.  Human beings have a primal instinct to have sex, often times with the one you "love?", that's just a part of life.  If she doesn't want to fuck anymore, especially if you used to have an awesome sex life, she's probably fucking someone else, therefore probably doesn't care about your thoughts and feelings.

Sign #6:

She has plenty of guy friends.  I know you simply cannot tell your girlfriend not to have guy friends, but if she truly has a probably with you hanging with girls (who are your) friends, then she probably has fucked a few of her guy "friends" and she's suspicious of those girls.  Keep an eye on your girlfriend, respect her space, don't be creepy.

Sign #7:

Your girlfriend has a thousand pictures of herself on myspace and/or facebook.  If she has that many pictures of herself, that means she likes looking at herself and that usually means she (in a roundabout way) wants people to desire her. If she claims they are for her friends to look at, that's bullshit, nobody ABSOLUTELY nobody, not even your closest friend cares that much about you. Friends may browse through pictures, but like ten at the most.  That many pictures means that they are vain. Plain and simple.

Sign #8:

Your relationship becomes about money.  Sure, your gf might go dutch on things starting out, but the seconds she starts wanting you buy her things non-stop, it's a problem, because she knows you won't say no and it's a material relationship, not a emotional.  My ex, about midway through the relationship started wanting me to buy her "gifts", which I don't mind doing occasionally, but this turned into a daily thing.  She started expecting it and this is not marriage, you should never expect anything out of your girlfriend and she shouldn't expect anything out of you.

Sign #9:

Your relationship starts effecting your work.  If a fight or a dispute about time ruins/drains your day emotionally, that's a problem. Dating someone should never be that taxing on your body and sometimes it is. When it becomes that time, you need to have a serious talk with them.

Sign #10:

She punishes you.  I'm 22 years old.  And I'm sad to say I allowed myself to be punished a few times.  It's never a big thing, just like, you were late to hang out, so you're going to get the cold shoulder or even worse, the silent treatment most of the night.  Remember guys, you're not married to this girl.  If she tries to act this way, try and talk it out, if that doesn't work, then fight fire with fire and leave. You shouldn't have to put up with that, if you do, you're a pussy like me.  However, now thinking things over, I'll never act that way again.  We're not children.

These are just a few warning signs.  Always keep your guard up and never let someone ruin your life, because they just like the idea of a boyfriend. Please be safe. Thank you for reading...